Easy Bake Ovens & Spiderman

     I never owned a Barbie, but my aunt did. In a big garbage bag, inside the closet of her room, in my grandma’s house in Mexico. Clothing, houses, cars, shoes, accessories, you name it. She had it all. I never wanted a Barbie, and whenever someone would give me one as a gift, it would go untouched sitting pretty on a shelf in my room. Still, on weekends when my family would meet up at my grandma’s house, my cousins and I would fight over those dolls. We would fight over which we wanted to play with, what clothes we wanted, anything. We were very passionate about those inanimate objects. I wasn’t unique though. I owned baby dolls. I never played with them. I guess I never found holding something in my arms entertaining. Cooking sets, on the other hand, was my passion. I’ve started multiple food franchises and opened in many locals, staying truthful to my customers, and taking honest reviews into account for future meals.

    I’ve always found my Barbie predicament quite perplexing. I have a distinct memory of an instance when I was trying very hard to entertain myself with dolls on a Saturday morning. My parents had not woken up yet and it was after they had told me they would not get me anything new until I used what I had. I remember the only thing going through my head as I moved those dolls around was “When are they going to wake up and see me doing this so I can get what I want?”. Playing with dolls by yourself is truly boring. What’s the fun of pretending like you don’t know exactly what the other doll is going to say in conversation? At least playing with my cousins there was some uncertainty and improvisation in our Barbie’s conversations. It’s the same with baby dolls. It’s a baby. It can eat, sleep, and drink. Except it’s a doll. So, it can do exactly none of these things. Pointless. The most I ever did with baby dolls was leave my baby at daycare (with my mom who was the grandma) and go to work. (I promise you I am not lying I confirmed with my mom.) The way I played games was reenacting what my life was like. Whenever I played kitchen, which was my work, it was not for myself, it was to get reviews from other people and improve my skills. First ‘imaginary’ food, and then easy bake ovens, and then recipes. In my childhood, I owned ovens, a donut maker, a cake pop maker, a chocolate maker, chocolate pens, an ice cream maker, a shaved ice maker, a popsicle maker, a blender, and approximately 800 different cookie molds. My cooking journey went from a Mexican easy bake to THE easy bake, to the real thing with parental supervision. I would say it’s safe to say I contributed to the sales of the Mi Alegria company more than any other kid I know.

I couldn’t tie any of this to Spiderman since that’s a whole other thing. Because I didn’t play with dolls when I was by myself, I watched TV. That’s why I think Tobey Maguire is the og Spiderman and not Andrew Garfield or Tom Holland or Shameik Moore. #1 fan since day one right here. How could I not be when the third movie came out my birth year? It was made for me.

PS-I don't want to be a chef